 |
| And that's how my chapter 3 ended... |
But here I
am; in a new flat with a new O.M.G.-amazing boyfriend (thanks for reading,
Universe!) and three years of research, writing, and substitute teaching ahead
of me. I will probably reread this blog sometime in the next year and curse
myself for being so naïve and/or blind, but whatevs. Right now, I’m basking in
the awesomeness of it (all the while waiting for that other shoe to drop).
 |
| I was really hoping it'd be a flip flop... |
Cynicism
aside, coming to England was the right way to round out my twenties. I had
grown so much from the distrusting, anal retentive chicken shit that I was into
this fearless, open, brave person I didn’t recognize. People tell me constantly
how much they admire my decision but to me there was no decision: I HAD to come
to England. To turn down the opportunity to obtain a degree in England, where
our history and our literature were BORN, would have been paramount to
figurative suicide.
 |
| I said FIGURATIVE!!!!! |
Because I
would have always wondered what would have been. I would have died the moment I
chose not to come because I would have always lived in that time of “what if I
had gone?”. For someone who has never really held others’ advice up to any sort
of light, it’s true, looking back, that you should always choose the riskier
option. Not in the
sense of taking all the drugs in the world, or drinking four bottles of Jack
Daniels then getting behind the wheel of a car. But in the sense of chasing
after the person you still love because you think you might be able to make it
work; attending the interview for a job you want but don’t feel qualified for because
qualifications are only a small part of why people get accepted into certain
careers; following a dream even if it leads you to a foreign land where you
know not a single person just because there’s nothing holding you back.
Yes, there
are things you might have to give up in order to follow that risky option, and
if you are more afraid of losing what you would give up than what you might
gain, then the riskier option is in sticking with your current situation. Is
this advice perfect for every situation? OF COURSE NOT! I’m not so egotistical
to think that I have the whole of society figured out, but I do know that if
you are unhappy in your current situation, if you feel stuck or like your whole
life is being wasted, MAKE A CHANGE! And don’t be scared of it. Embrace the
fear, the change, the risk. Otherwise, you’ll just be another empty husk,
wondering what would have been. And I’d really rather not live in a Zombieland. Dawn of the Dead was scary enough.
 |
